Sunday, January 11, 2009

Blog Transfer Announcement, January 11, 2009

As of January 1, 2009, the Camelot Journal of L/L Research moves to, the spiritual community and activism site of L/L Research. To view my Camelot Journal blog entries from now on, please go to The Avalon Journal will also be moved to B4 in the near future.

To view the archives of these Journals prior to 2009, please go to

I thank the site for hosting my blogs for the last three years and more! It has been commodious and comfortable here. However it is a great joy for all of us at L/L Research to see launched, and I encourage you to hop on over and check out the site. You can join us to blog, use the forums and live chat and you will find many other ways as well to interact with other seekers who enjoy the L/L Research offerings such as the Law of One and other Confederation material.

To check out our archive site, go to There you can find the Law of One sessions, a dozen books or more, over 1500 channeling transcripts and other goodies.

L/L xxx -

Carla L. Rueckert-McCarty
L/L Research


Thunder awoke me early in the dark and by the time I arose it was drizzling steadily. I came down to find Lorena up and working on the LOOP (Law of One Prisoners) Newsletter. It is her fifth issue and the beginning of her second year with the L/L Research prison ministry. She has done a wonderful job! And I think this is her best issue yet. I began the morning’s work by consulting with her over format and doing a bit of “translation” from “Ra-Speak” to the vernacular for part of her issue.

I responded to Ian’s request for the dates of the third Channeling Intensive, as I am beginning now to send him edited transcripts from that Gathering. I also talked with him about unifying gender for Channeling Circle 8’s story.

Gary came up with a large sheaf of items to work on with me, and we spent a companionable couple of hours, before and after lunch, hashing out issues having to do with what content stays on our archive site now that B4 is up and running, and establishing a general policy for such decisions in the future. We got that worked out well, I think, quite logically.

Our biggest question was, what content having to do with L/L Gatherings goes on llresearch and what goes on B4. We decided that future and present material goes on B4. Then when the Gathering is over and we are collecting any transcripts or finalizing the curriculum for that Gathering, it goes on the archive site.

I finally had my chapel time in mid-afternoon and wrote my Holly Journal entry. Then it was time for my first Live Chat on B4. I had been concerned mostly that I could keep up with the questions in such a way as to make it clear to whom I was talking and then to make it clear when I was typing for a while and when I was finished. I got better at that as time went on. It was delightful and I really enjoyed the time.

Gary was by my side for this first attempt to work the software, for well he knows my status with computers in general: challenged! He was a great help, and I believe from now on I can do this by myself, which is a great feeling. Steve E., webmaster for B4, acted as my emcee, feeding me the questions one at a time, or trying to do so! Sometimes my follow-ups to a previous question intruded on the next question. But I believe we caught all the questions eventually. I will repeat this next week. I am thinking about making it a weekly occurrence. We’ll see how popular the offering is after a month of trying this out.

Romi invited Lorena and me to dine at Volare, one of my very favorite restaurants. We had such a good time and dined royally! Salmon Crostini – we split it three ways – was followed by seafood bisque and then both Lorena and I got their sea bass, which was incredibly good! What a meal! Homage to the chef! And many thanks to the Ro Man, who truly fed my foolish love of eating out in the best possible way!

We got back to find Gary, Mick and John Daniel waiting for us, and began the meeting forthwith. After a good round-robin talk, I tuned and we had a good channeling session. Gary’s question for tonight was on the dynamic between light and dark and how it seems that as we progress towards positive polarity, we get more powerful temptations from the service-to-self polarity. It was an interesting question and I look forward to editing that transcript when it comes back and seeing what the Q’uo principle said. I offered the Gaia Meditation prayer at the end of the session.

We conversed for a while most enjoyably after the session. Gary loves caves, and JD has one for him near his home which is no longer open to the public, with more formations by far, he says, than Mammoth Cave. I see a trip to visit Daniel in Gary’s near future! Finally Romi and John Daniel had to leave. JD had a two-hour drive back to Bowling Green, so we got him set up with a big mug of coffee to keep him awake and safe on his way home.

Saturday, January 10, 2009


Mick awoke me at 8:00 a.m. in Fox and Steve’s lovely bedroom, the sunrise still pink and orange on the horizon. We came downstairs to find the couple preparing our breakfast – homemade waffles served with their own blueberries in a homemade compote, homemade cherry preserves, butter and maple syrup. They also produced juice, coffee and sausage and we had a most enjoyable meal together before going outside to see their new construction.

Steve has built everything in his home except the foundations. It runs to three levels now as well as including a large garage and Steve’s woodworking shop, over which extension is a full story of storage for building supplies. He has also created a greenhouse attached to the other side of the house. Now he is projecting out from their kitchen forward to create a full dining room off the kitchen and below it, a large studio for Fox’s weaving. She creates beautiful fabrics on her loom and in latter years has become increasingly able to find catalog and store outlets for her lovely handmade work.

Melissa was in her element as the couple showed us around, asking all kinds of questions and sharing from her vast research. She and Fox spent a good bit of time looking at her loom and materials while I went with Steve and Mick to see Steve’s growing collection of indigenous rock. As he’s dug out for these new additions to their home, when he comes across rock he harvests and sorts it. He has in mind – after the current projects are finished – a large area of patio connecting all the elements of the home. By the time he gets to that, he will have all the materials he needs!

The H’s are a very inspiring couple. Good and true, they met each other during their college years and from that day forward, they have been together. Eventually they married and had children, two beautiful babies whom Fox home-schooled. I remember the day she had to let them go to enter public high school. She said, “I am going to miss them so much!” In this day and age, a family who treasures their kids and wants to keep them close is a rarity.

The family now runs to six grandkids, which is what is driving Steve to build the dining room, and theirs is an extremely loving family, geographically and emotionally close and supportive. The life they have built is beautiful in so many ways! I admire them tremendously and it is such fun to be with them as they share the bounty of their farm and the sweetness of their personalities and lives with us!

We drove home to Camelot through warming temperatures and brilliant sunshine, with a pale full moon to guide us and mackerel clouds drifting by. When we got back, Lorena L, who had come down from Chicago last night late in order to work over the weekend on the next issue of L/L Research’s prisoner newsletter, The LOOP (Law of One – Prisoners, which she creates, had joined Gary in the office. The atmosphere was festive, with great music playing.

Mel caravaned with me to Bachman Subaru, where the parts which our encounter with the dog on our trip to Nebraska had destroyed had come in. On our way home we stopped by the cleaners to drop off my sweater, on which I had dropped tomato soup last week. They handed it back to me saying that they had no solution which would remove that stain. Rats! It is a favorite old garment of mine!

We also stopped by Ben Franklin, where we shored up our supply of giftwrapping items which last Christmas had depleted, all on good sale. We even scored six more trays for use when we have large L/L Research Gatherings. Now I think we have enough trays to serve 35 people. That’s a good feeling! And I found four tree ornaments for 1/16th their original price! That’s my first Christmas purchase for Christmas 2009!

Mick made a run up to Avalon to dump a big load of storm debris which he had cleared for a customer yesterday while I came upstairs to write my journals and have my chapel time – a late hour for that, but we were off schedule for the best of reasons! When he got back, my beloved Stanley Outback was ready to pick up and he took me there to collect it.

I spent the rest of the work day editing on Channeling Circle 11, the question for which was about the spiritual use of a sense of humor. I got within three pages of finishing that before bath time. So far it contains very good work by the new channels! I also collected a nifty, simple recipe for Honey Mustard Chicken.

As I came downstairs, Mel was just leaving, so we had our hugs and goodbyes. After Mick and I bathed we enjoyed a great date together. We were stunned by the energy we raised with seemingly no effort. I looked into his eyes and said, “Incredible!” he replied, “Miraculous! Thank you, Lord!” Feeling the best I have all day, I joined Mick downstairs and thought to join Gary and Lorena as well, but Gary had taken Lorena out for dinner, so we enjoyed a solitary late supper and then I offered the closing prayer at the Gaia Meditation.

Friday, January 09, 2009


My day started early, as I awoke early and arose instead of rolling over for another hour of snoozing. I wanted to have time to write my journals, have chapel time and write Steve E a thank-you letter for his marvelous and ongoing work on B4. I got that done in good time to come downstairs and enter in to the regular morning schedule.

After Morning Offering Mick set out on a run up to Avalon with the harvest of storm debris from yesterday’s JLS (Jim's Lawn Service) work with clearing downed trees for a customer. I caught up with correspondence with Ian, our archive site web guy, and then tackled the editing of Channeling Circle 8, from Channeling Intensive Three held last October. I found the story that the circle members channeled quite interesting. The only changes I made were to unify the tense of the story and the sex of the main character.

After lunch I enjoyed a manicure with my nail tech, Bethany, making good inroads now on my ingrown fingernails. As I grow older, those nails are ever more prone to roll right into my fingers on both sides of their nail beds, so I have recently upped my manicures from one a month to twice monthly, to very good effect.

Gary and I had made a date with Steve E, webmaster for B4, for a practice session for me in preparation for the live chat session scheduled for 3:00 p.m. EST on Saturday. Never have we been so glad for a rehearsal! My software balled up and sulked in SO many ways! Before the session ended we had installed Firefox freeware to replace my old Outlook and fiddled with the settings on my version of B4’s chat rooms site.

We also decided that Steve would not only moderate during our chat time of 3-5:00, but also emcee, placing himself between me and the people tuning in. I have a tendency to focus down on what I am doing, and have not learned at all well yet how to expand my awareness to multitask. Steve will make up for my lack by feeding me one question at a time.

After I left the meeting, Gary continued to work with Steve for some time, and I believe we’re good to go now for the Saturday session. I am jazzed and looking forward to the time. If it goes well I shall make it a weekly event.

I’ve limited my exposure to the general public in the last few years so that I can accomplish creative projects, and that’s a good decision. But now I can be more accessible, and give back to those who support me so beautifully, for two hours a week. And I think that, too, is a very good decision.

Melissa, Mick and I then drove down to Perryville, Kentucky, in Boyle County, as the night came and the weather turned frosty. We bore pizza and homemade mulled apple cider as gifts for Fox and Steve H, with whom we had planned to watch the National Championship Bowl. The drive down was delightful, as Mick had bought Yusuf Islam’s (formerly Cat Stevens’) new album, “Another Cup of Tea”. I loved every note!

We got there in good time for the game, which we enjoyed in their fairly newly built media room. Mick’s alma mater for his master’s degree in early childhood education, the University of Florida, won handily over Oklahoma in a defensively powered, relatively low-scoring game. It was so great to watch it with good friends!

Since we were not in a position to make a Gaia Meditation offering tonight, Mick and I simply passed the peace during a time-out break! We said our night-time prayers in our snug room in the same fairly new addition to their house while Mel tucked herself in downstairs in the H’s other guest room. Mick and I fell asleep with Venus shining in the window, blessing our slumber!

Thursday, January 08, 2009


As the cold rain fell, and fell, and fell, and the city skies were pearly-white, Mick and I made our Morning Offering. Mick had already gone out, sprinkling calcium chloride at the day care center at St. Luke’s and on the three customers’ walks who have subscribed to that service this winter, while I wrote my Camelot Journal entry for yesterday.

I did a bit of personal e-mail and batted back the junk mail. Then I had my chapel time and asked Holly what the ER experience yesterday was all about. Hollt's answer is worth repeating here. She said,

"Living a life in Christ is a challenge indeed. If you follow all the injunctions of the Bible for diet and so forth, that is one kind of challenge – but not the challenge which cuts to the heart of the Christian injunction to love the Lord and your neighbor as yourself.

"Sometimes, the person one is most challenged to love turns out to be the self. When one is ill, helpless, vulnerable or uncomfortable, temptations arise that are a real challenge. There is the temptation to criticize the self for being in such a condition. There is the temptation to lose heart. There is the temptation to feel all alone. There is the temptation towards self-pity. These constitute a challenge which only a seasoned disciple of Christ can encounter with the knowledge that all is well and a prayer of thankfulness that such a challenge has been offered.

"When challenges of this kind come, accept them in gratitude and rest in peace of mind, knowing that the Lord is with you every moment of the way."

Meanwhile Mick manhandled the Christmas tree through the front door after gently laying away our homemade tree-top angel, our many ornaments, each with a story to tell of who gave it to us and when, and the lights that had wreathed the tree.

We went at 11:30 for a conversation with our trust officer, Doris S. Over a delicious lunch we talked over strategies and concerns. It was an excellent conversation. Doris will continue to lower our exposure to Exxon, with whose ethics we are in disagreement. We also will continue to look for non-equity sources of good investment for Don’s legacy to us. That trust has been our go-to for special needs for 25 years now, and we hope to nurture it well into the future.

When we returned to Camelot I came upstairs to my bower to edit another recent channeling session, this one responding to a question from Gary on the difference, speaking in terms of energy expenditure, of channeling radiance of being and being radiant. It was a fascinating session for me, and also contained an interesting Q and A on illness and the spiritual principles concerning it.

After a good warm bath for Mick and me to toast our cold toes and fingers and enjoy being clean – a metaphysical event for me as well as a physical one – I was off to choir practice at St. Luke’s. We had a wonderful rehearsal, starting the New Year with lots of new music for Epiphany, that wonderful liturgical season of light. I swam in the music like an otter! Whee! And I got to sing alto all night, a singular treat!

When I returned home we offered the Gaia Meditation – Mick offered the closing prayer - and then had Gary’s Christmas. He’s been gone for all previous 2008 occasions to open presents, so we had our own ceremony quite late. Gary gave me the best present ever: a certificate good for his detailing Stanley Outback! He’s superb at doing this, and Stanley will soon shine! Mick received one gadget which lets him listen to his beloved iPod in the car and another one for the iPod which I did not understand – but Mick did and he was thrilled!

We gave Gary a gift card to the nicest near shopping center, where he promised to spend it on clothes and books, and a couple of pairs of flannel-lined jeans for his camping excursions. And he exclaimed over Mel’s stocking, which was amazingly generous, filled with three candles for his baths, lock de-icer and all manner of candies, nuts and fruit. Merry Christmas, again!

Wednesday, January 07, 2009


While the skies wept over chilly Kentucky, I spent my morning writing my journals, having chapel time and rewriting a paragraph in my UPI article on Chris Jordan to include more places to see his photographic images. Then I had an early lunch, as at 1:00 p.m. I was due downtown at Norton’s Hospital for a new procedure to me, an epidural in which anti-inflammatory medicine is placed directly into the neck area. I have recently had a good deal of nerve pain in that area and down my shoulders and arms.

Unfortunately I thought that the procedure was to take place at The Spine Institute, and I arrived there and waited for half an hour before the receptionist realized that my doctor was not at the Institute today. She called me up to investigate and I told her that I was there for an epidural. She said that they did not give them there but at a hospital. A record search showed that the appointment had been made at Norton’s. They kindly called over to Norton’s for me to explain the foul-up to them and Mick and I searched out the place I was to go in the rambling Norton’s campus. Thank heavens for wheel chairs! I would never have made the long trek on foot.

Once there the nurse spent time getting my health history – it is complicated and lengthy – and prepping me for the epidural. The procedure went well and I liked Dr. Morris, who has been doing this procedure for 19 years with a perfect record. The problem came when my blood pressure would not go back down after the procedure. Morris sent me to Norton Hospital's emergency room. By now it was after 3:00.

It was a wet and sloppy day on Louisville streets, and one ambulance after another rolled in while Mick and I waited. All of these cases were more urgent than mine, and so they went in ahead of us. Hours sauntered slowly by. It got dark. Eventually I suggested that we get something to eat, since once I was called back for treatment, food would not be allowed. Mick got a cafeteria meal for us both.

At 7:30 the nurse said that he had prepared a bed for me in the aisle of the treatment rooms, because he hated to see me in the waiting room so long. Back Mick and I went. We had a great view of the action of a downtown ER. For each patient, a different piece of ungainly equipment rolled by and was used. Each machine sounded a different tune, one like a harmonica playing a five-note tune, another dinging, another clanging. We spent time speculating on the nature of each pile of metal bells and whistles.

My favorite patient during this period was a very large, older woman of color whose opulent flesh overflowed her treatment bed. She had a marvelously fashioned, highly bouffant wig on, or mostly on. When she moved her head, the wig stayed where it was. The effect was fetching!

The ER doctors kept me until 10:00 p.m., giving me oxygen and medicine to lower the blood pressure that had landed me there and taking my blood pressure again and again. It came down from 230 to 200, and they finally agreed that I could go home as long as I made an appointment to follow up with my family doctor.

I already have an appointment with Dr. Aboud, my GP, on January 20th, and it is likely that I could not get an earlier appointment than that, so I easily agreed. It was never so sweet to see Camelot. Our Christmas lights were up for one last night as the Feast of Epiphany comes and Christmas’s twelve days end.

Mick and I offered the Gaia Meditation there in the ER hallway, since that’s where we were at 9:00. However the prayer was never completed at the close, because suddenly there was a rumpus in one of the treatment rooms with a foul-mouthed woman screaming her lungs out, demanding that she not be touched and accusing the staff of improprieties. Mick and I opened our eyes, looked at each other and, over the din, said, “Peace!”

I prayed, "Holly, I thank you for the gift of this day. When it is convenient, I would love to know the nature of this gift! Lay it on me!" The attitude of gratitude always makes things better, and I look forward to Holly's eventual explanation!

Tuesday, January 06, 2009


I started this cloudy, warm day by composing ten questions and answers for the St. Luke’s choir’s upcoming Trivial Pursuit Night in the area of literature. They are holding the event smack dab across our usual Saturday night public meeting time so I cannot attend, but I can help chairperson Kathy get ready for the event!

I slept too late this morning to write my journals before waking Mick, so I spent a part of the morning having my chapel time and making entries in the Camelot Journal and the Holly Journal. Then I started writing an article on Chris Jordan for my difference-maker series on UPI’s blog site, where I blog as A Small Medium At Large. I finished the rough draft in time to make it to a doctor’s appointment at 3:00 p.m. and tidied it up when I returned.

It felt so much like spring when I was outside! Recent rains have perked up the grasses and it smelled green and hopeful! Dan D. Lion was there when I got back, ready for lots of pats on my way inside from the car. He's thriving in the wild, huskier and more powerful by far than when he was an inside cat.

I also let Doris know by e-mail that Mick prefers to meet for our business appointment at her office rather than at a restaurant as we had originally planned.

Mick arrived home at dusk after putting in a hard-working day splitting tree trunk pieces for a customer who wanted her storm debris turned into firewood. He collected the debris that was too small to split and took it up to Avalon to dump where Melissa had marked for it to go, at the edge of the access road. He was so glad to get that big job done! Now he’s ready to tackle another, even bigger job at St. Luke’s, more downed trees from the big windstorm last fall.

We enjoyed a long hot bath together before coming upstairs for a date, which was just lovely. Then we had supper and offered the Gaia Meditation, with Mick praying at the close.

Monday, January 05, 2009


While the skies lowered and the thermometer topped 60 F, Mick and I had a restful Sabbath. I enjoyed a second Sunday of Christmas and the choir sang a carol by Hector Berlioz, "The Shepherd’s Farewell", a sweet piece, for the anthem.

Mick took me home to our newly sparkling house and we sat down to lunch while viewing a singularly beautiful movie, Flashbacks of a Fool. The excellence of the film did not lie in the theme of its screenplay, which dealt with the well worn tale of regret while looking back at a wasted talent and life. Rather, its excellence lay in the symmetry and unhurried storytelling of the script, and its seamless realization by the key character, played as an adult by Daniel Craig and as a teenager by Harry Eden.

The surrounding ensemble was entirely competent. Mark Strong, Olivia Williams and Claire Forlani offered excellent support to Craig’s and Eden’s joint portrayal of Joe Scot, a person wooed from meaningful living by his own physical beauty. And the cinematography was spellbinding, lovingly caressing all at which it looked. Songs by David Bowie, Roxy Music and Scott Walker underscored the movement of the piece seamlessly. I cannot say that the film edified or enlightened, but as a work of art it was perfect. I loved the film and awoke from its ending as from a lovely and enchanted dream.

Our second feature was Martin Scorsese’s look at a recent Rolling Stones concert tour, Shine A Light. What a great romp! It was terrific to see the performances, the four durable rockers supported by excellent, compelling turns by Jack White, Christine Aguilera and Buddy Guy. The entire cast had the best time!

What are the odds that four teenagers – Mick Jagger, Ronny Woods, Keith Richards and Charlie Watts – would live into their sixties with full heads of hair and not an extra pound on their frames? Their youthful physiques made the look of the show eternal and iconic.

I have been fascinated by the perfection of Jagger’s concentration and focus as an artist ever since seeing him, a couple of decades ago, in The Rolling Stones at the Imax. I saw that film half a dozen times. Jagger and his cohorts may seem as though they are playing onstage, as indeed they are, but there is not a note off-key, not a beat out of place and each song's playing is as tight as a drum.

Jagger continues in this film to amaze me with the precision of his art. He is a delight to see, not simply in terms of entertaining but also, for the eye of a former back-up singer in the seventies, in terms of the razor-sharp edge of his performance. As he skips, runs and gyrates, he brings a rhythmic energy to the music that explicates rather than accompanies. His lyrics are crisp and clean, each note accurately placed, sensitively styled and in the middle of the pitch.

Scorsese manages in a few economic scenes, moreover, to capture the manic spontaneity of rock and roll as he fruitlessly tries to find out what songs the lads are planning to play. His humor is entirely self-deprecating and devoid of egotism, and the embroidery of the backstage angst adds the perfect foil to the singing.

Five Bic flicks to this grand, engaging and generous concert film.

We called Mick’s Mom and enjoyed a late supper before the Gaia Meditation, at which Mick offered the closing prayer.